Talks with God

 

I talk with God a lot. Some people call it prayer or meditation but I treat it like a normal conversation.  It happens like this. I'll be doing some everyday task like washing dishes in the kitchen. I start by saying something like, "Oh hey it's me again, just popping in for some advice." And just like I would if I were chatting with an old friend over coffee I begin.

"What in the heck should I do about my job, my family, my life?" I rinse and load one dish.

"I'm here," I say back. It's me, but not really me. I hear the Spirit's voice as clear as day sometimes. But only when I'm ready to listen.

"Okay, noted. But what about the future?" I say "What should I do?" I scrub some hardened ketchup off of a plate.

"Keep writing" I hear.

"How can I make money doing what I love?" I ask. I rinse out my dish rag with warm water.

"I've given you a spirit of creativity mixed with a big dose of practicality. Use it." It says.

"Where do you want me to go from here?" I stare out the window over my sink into my backyard at dusk.

"Keep writing." It urges.

"What's next God?" I pick up a new plate.

"Keep taking one step at a time." It begs.

And then that's it. Chat time is over and I'm back to my life. The door has closed for now, the line temporarily disconnected, it's just me and my overflowing sink. That's not to say that God isn't there with me in the mundane.  God is alongside me in all things, both in and and moving through me. It's just to say that that's all the reveal I'll get for tonight. Like a movie preview for a new release still years away.

I love these verses from Ecclesiastes 3: "I have seen the business that God has given to everyone to be busy with. He has made everything suitable for its time; moreover he has put a sense of past and future into their minds, yet they cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. I know that there is nothing better for them than to be happy and enjoy themselves as long as they live; moreover, it is God's gift that all should eat and drink and take pleasure in their toil. I know that whatever God does endures forever; nothing can be added to it, nor anything taken from it; God has done this, so that all should stand in awe before him."


I doubt. I hem and I haw. I try to jump two steps ahead of the process.
But then I remember my role is simply to be present. To lean into the Spirit, to trust.

It's almost painful in its simplicity.

I want more. I want to see more, be more, to act beyond my capacity.

But then I'm reminded "I'm here. Be here now with me."

So I keep washing my dishes, and allow myself to rest, to hang up my worries and discard today's anxieties.

I have done enough for today. Tomorrow is a new day. There will be more dishes in the morning.